Communication A Vital Part of Life

As a child, I found it very hard to communicate verbally. It was not that I could not talk or did not have anything important to say, it was that my emotions would always get in the way. This was very embarrassing for me because if I was nervous or upset it would show in my voice and I would always end up crying. School was the hardest part for me. I would just keep quiet and the kids and teachers at school would just think that I was shy. In a way, I was shy, but it was more than just that. I was afraid that I would humiliate myself and as a result I began writing to express myself. I felt free and could be outspoken for a change. This was a wonderful feeling I was uninhibited and was finally able to express myself without the fear of my emotions getting in the way.

I have learned to love writing as it provided a means for me to express myself in a way I could not before. Although, I am not a child anymore, I still find it easier to communicate in writing. My writing has developed and improved over the years along with my spelling and grammar. I have generally overcome my fear of communicating verbally and I communicate orally most of the time, but I still prefer to communicate in writing from time to time when I feel emotional or nervous about something. The problem with this is I cannot always do so and have had to learn some techniques to calm down and relax. This seems to work for the most part and has made my life much easier.

What I have found works the best for me is to overcome my fear by, "taking the bull by the horns," so to speak. The more you confront your fear the easier it becomes for you to get over it. You know what they say, "Practice makes perfect!" I can really identify with Malcolm X as when he learned how to write it opened up a whole new world for him and he felt free. I felt the same way when I learned how to express myself in writing.

I never really realized how important language and communication were until I met my husband's family for the first time. They are Cuban refugees and when we first met, they had only been here for a few years and did not speak English. They seemed friendly enough, but I could not communicate with them unless my husband was there to translate everything we said. Then came the moment my husband, (who was my fiance at the time,) had to leave for a few minutes. Some of his family members who arrived late came by to introduce themselves and say hello to me unaware that I did not speak a word of Spanish they tried to carry on a conversation with me. The expression on my face when my husband came back was that of sheer embarrassment. Of course my husband rescued me and told them that I did not speak a word of Spanish and they all laughed and understood why I did nothing but say "What?"

After the initial meeting with my husband's family, I decided that in order to be able to communicate with my in-laws I would need to learn Spanish. So, I bought a Spanish books and learned how to count, the days of the week, months of the year, and most nouns in Spanish. With the help of my husband and in-laws I began speaking Spanish. My husband's way of helping me was by teaching me to say things in Spanish the wrong way then having me repeat them in front of his family who would laugh hysterically at me. But that was okay because I taught my husband and in-laws how to say things in English the wrong way too, then I would have them repeat it.

After all the joking was over and I got serious about learning Spanish, I actually learned quite a bit. My in-laws , by the same token, learned to speak some English. We now can communicate together in what I refer to as "Spanglish," where we both speak some English and some Spanish, and we end up understanding each other quite well. My father in-law even taught me how to cook Cuban food with no translation from my husband at all!